Seriously. I'd like to just catch a break. Just once.
Today's ultrasound showed growth- but the sac is abnormally shaped. The u/s tech was not very optimistic about the prognosis. There was no sign of a fetal pole or yolk sac.
We met with the OB who isn't ready to throw in the towel yet. He does give us less than a 50% chance of this ending with a take home baby. He said he's seen stranger things. I opted not to take any more HCG labs. We're back for another ultrasound next Monday where the OB feels will give us a clear direction.
I really don't know what to think. It's technically only 5w5d today- so still early, right? It turns out that Thursday's HCG was actually 5500- not 5000. So a real nice jump from the 2300 on Monday. It's like one step forward and two steps back. There is almost no spotting- just a smidge on the TP of brown.
I'm afraid to hold onto hope because I know that each and every day means that I will fall even harder if this ends in a m/c. I'm afraid to to do much on Dr. Goo.gle, but I am hoping to find some good news out there.
Do I dare keep hoping for a miracle?
Oh Patience I'm so sorry. Nothing is ever easy for us, is it. Its good though that your OB isn't ready to throw in the towel. I hope this is just one hurdle you have to face before you get your take home baby.
ReplyDelete(((HUGS)))
It is never straightforward, which is sooo upsetting. I don't know what to make of it all - good hcg, abnormal shaped sac? no clue what it all means. i think your ob is right to wait a week and see, it is just so early still, who knows what is really going on. I hope you can take it easy this week - teach sitting down??? j/k, but not a bad idea either :)
ReplyDeleteOh I am so with you - I wish you could catch a break too. I have no idea what an abnormally shaped sac means, but I am glad your doctor is willing to give this pregnancy all the chances possible to make it. You still are very early. Fingers crossed for thee best for you, and for peace ad hope in the waiting. I don't really think there is ever a way to be pregnant and not have attachment and hope. Losing a pregnancy at any stage is devastating and there is no way to prepare your heart for a loss like that.
ReplyDeleteoh sweetie- I am so very sorry. Here to hold your hand through these next steps.
ReplyDeleteI'm really sorry that the results weren't more conclusive with this u/s. I like your OB's approach of waiting before making a pronouncement on this pregnancy. It's unclear right now, and as hard as it is to endure, you just don't know what's going to happen next. And this is agony, so please, please, please take excellent care of yourself. Thinking of you and hoping, praying for the best.
ReplyDeleteUGH. I was hoping you'd get some answers today. I think u/s this early are tough. There really isn't much to see and if the equipment isn't great...well then there is even less to see. I know what it's like to want to protect your heart. Just keep taking things one day at a time. I'm thinking of you.
ReplyDeleteI so hope next weeks ultrasound brings clarity and that you catch a break!! I am so sorry.
ReplyDeleteI wish today's news had been more clear cut for you. I am sorry that you are shoved ever deeper into Limbo-land.
ReplyDeleteI have been in the exact same situation before and know how difficult it is. I cross my fingers for you. Thinking about you!
ReplyDeleteI am so sorry Patience. I am sending you lots of hugs and good wishes. Please hang in there!
ReplyDeleteThinking of you. Big hugs.
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