Reflecting on 2013

It's almost impossible to put into words.  Twenty thirteen was one heck of a year!  When I look back at this post I wrote on January 1st, I was finally feeling hopeful that 2013 was going to be our year.  Boy was it ever! 

After years of wishing, praying, hoping, dreaming, that this would be the year... we finally did it.  We finally got to have the year of our lives.  For the first time ever, I am actually a little sad to see a year end.  It will be the year that will always hold most of Quinn's "firsts."  For that, 2013 will always be one of the most cherished years of my life.  However, I know that we have so much to look forward to, that I am also very excited to see what 2014 will hold.

Before we move on,  pardon me while I take a moment to reminisce about 2013. 

January brought lots of nesting as we prepared for M's baby.  I set up the nursery, went to an u/s with her, and she visited our home.  We had no idea how much life would change... for the better.... in the coming month!

February will forever be my favorite month ever!  Our lives changed in a moment when Quinn was finally placed in our arms on February 18th.  He was born 2/13/13 and his birthmother chose us after finding our profile through facebook.  She has chosen to remain anonymous, but we communicate with her each month via email.  We'll never understand the magnitude of her decision, and by the grace of the hard work of our attorney, we were able to move mountains to make sure he was in our forever family. 

March brought my 38th birthday.  What a difference a year makes!  Feeling nothing but the luck of the Irish this year, and loving every moment of maternity leave with my sweet baby.  No crazy spring break trips for us this year, just lots of snuggle time with our little miracle!  We also celebrated Quinn's first Easter.  He wasn't all that impressed with the chocolate just yet.  :)  M's baby is born, but we are not notified.

April meant my return to work.  It was a tough adjustment, but thankful for amazing coworkers and friends who make me love what I do. Quinn also made his swim team debut at the annual swim team banquet.  We're so incredibly blessed to have so many people who love our little man and want to support us in any way they can.   We also learned that M had decided to parent, and we made peace with being a family of three.

May brought Chris' 40th birthday.  Neither of us ever said it, but it was important to both of us that we become parents before he turned 40.  I was able to throw a (not really) surprise party for him.  Again, we were surrounded by the people who mean the most to us.  It was so exciting to share this milestone birthday with those we love and cherish.  Some of our swimmers even managed to make it home from college to surprise him.  May also brought my very first Mother's day.  What an incredible day that was!

June brought our 17th wedding anniversary... which we celebrated in Florida with our senior swim team.  It was a great trip, and Quinn's first plane ride and visit to the ocean.  Neither of us saw the ocean until we were in our 20's so he's already well ahead of his parents!  :)  He was a trooper and did very well on the trip.  Really not a fan of the ocean, but hoping by 2014 he will enjoy it just a little!

July was Quinn's first race with daddy on the 4th.  We tried to make the most of Mommy's really short summer and embraced all that summer had to offer.  We spent lots of time outside and playing with friends.  I also faced one of my greatest fears and had oral surgery in July.  The healing wasn't as bad as the anticipation!

August meant back to work for me.  It also meant a week of being a single mom while Chris was in California with our swimmers at the National Meet.  It was a tough week- I missed being with Chris on the trip, Quinn & I missed having Daddy home, and I had to shuffle Quinn from sitter to sitter for the week.  We made it work, but it was tough.  Quinn also started solid foods this month.  I was really excited for him to try avocado- he had no interest at all.

September meant the start of the Fall season.  We spent lots of time with friends, and made a trip to the apple orchard.  We tried to experience all that fall had to offer!

October brought more fall fun, with a trip to the pumpkin patch with friends from school.  Quinn also had minor surgery, and came through like a champ.  Quinn didn't do any trick or treating, but loved passing out candy at Aunt Miriam's house with everyone.  He was our little Clark Kent for Halloween- a nod to his super start in life.  :)

November reminded us to take a moment to reflect on how much we have to be thankful for.  We are so incredibly blessed!  Quinn had his first illness in November, but handled it better than mom and dad did!  He was our favorite little turkey for Thanksgiving, but had no interest in eating anything that we tried to share!

December brought the magic of Christmas.  We've dreamed of sharing Christmas with a child for so many years.  It was purely magical.  Quinn has been the greatest gift we could ever ask for. We're forever thankful to his birthmother who chose to entrust us with raising this little soul.

And now, on this last day of 2013- we can't even believe all the good that encompassed the year.  We're forever changed and can't believe we get to spend next year- and every year after that- with this sweet soul.  Our hearts are full as we look into 2014.

Thank you for those of you who are still reading.  I know I haven't been the best blogger this year.  Hoping that I'll be able to get back into a routine and be able to share some of my thoughts on parenting, adoption, teaching, and so much more in 2014.

Here's something I found online and it just spoke to me... my wishes for each of you in 2014.

Merry Christmas!

Yes, we're in matching plaid thanks to Gymboree. Please don't judge. ;)

We had an incredible first Christmas. I can't even begin to put it in words. Feeling so incredibly blessed. Santa was very good to us! 

December Update- 9 & 10 months and more

So many of the blogs I regularly read during our struggle are like this one... we're not posting nearly as much as we once did.  It isn't because I don't have things to share.  It isn't because I don't have a million things I need to process about being an adoptive mom and life in general.  It isn't because I don't yearn to be a part of the community that kept me sane for all those years. 

It's about time.  There just isn't enough of it.  There's always something that needs my attention it seems.  Hoping that will change now that I have finished one of the big time drainers...

I graduated with a second master's degree last Saturday.  This is my second MSEd, this one in Instructional Technology.  It was tough doing it all while working full time and being a new mom.  I'm DONE with taking classes for a LONG time now!

Our sweet boy is now 10 months old.  I missed his 9 month update here on the blog, but here is the gist of what I sent to his birthmom last month:

Quinn continues to grow into an amazing little man.  He's a little over 23lbs and 30 inches.  His height is now officially off the growth chart!  :)  He is on the move, and has mastered crawling, but we're pretty sure he'll be walking in no time.  He's also learned to clap for himself, and does it regularly when he pulls himself up to a sitting position.    Bottles are still his preference over solid foods, but we are working on that!  His favorites continue to be cereal and sweet potatoes with apples and he isn't a fan of anything green. 

His personality continues to blossom.  He's a really happy little guy and has a little twinkle in his eye that tells us he's got a mischievous side as well.  He's a little bit of a daredevil and is in constant motion.  He's almost always smiling and has an infectious laugh.  He and our dog Romeo are already partners in crime.  Romeo has learned to sit very close to Quinn's high chair, especially when he's eating!

Quinn "celebrated" his first Halloween as Clark Kent/Superman.  He loved greeting the trick or treaters at the door and passing out candy.  He also enjoyed his first trip to a corn maze with our swim team and attended the Illinois swimming Athlete Recognition Dinner. 

Our little Clark Kent:

We had our family portraits taken to commemorate Quinn's adoption being final.  Here are a few of our favorites:

He's now ten months old, and is growing and changing every day.  His personality is really emerging.  I can't express how in love we are with this little man!

He has eight teeth and will eat most things that are fully pureed, but wants little to do with anything textured.  Hoping he grows out of that soon!  He has 8 teeth and the next one is already starting to break through.  With his set of teeth, he could be eating steak!  He still loves his bottles but also has discovered that he really likes yogurt and other sweet treats. 

He is fully crawling, and wants to get into everything.  He loves music and rocks to the beat with just about anything.  He's standing on his own and has discovered his crib can double as a trampoline.  We're sure it is only a matter of time before he is walking. 

He was the unofficial mascot for the Warren HS girls swim team, and loved every bit of attention from the girls on the pool deck.  He's also enjoyed visits from our college swimmers as they have come home for visits.  We love that he has so many young adults who want to be a part of his life.  It makes our heart happy to see each of them make a connection to our sweet boy.

He's continuing to top the charts... he's more than 30 inches tall and about 25lbs.  He's wearing 12-18 month clothes for the most part and in 5w shoes!  He wasn't a fan of shoes at first, but is starting to tolerate them since they help him stand and get where he wants to go.  He's back to sleeping through the night, and for that we are very thankful!

His official birth certificate finally arrived right before Thanksgiving.  This was the final piece of paperwork we needed for his adoption to be completely final.  Next step is to get a passport for any adventures we hope to take.

We took him to see Santa over the weekend.  As you'll see from the photos, he wasn't much of a fan.  We know that he'll come around in a few years for sure.  There simply aren't words to describe how excited we are to celebrate Christmas with Quinn this year.  The entire holiday season takes on a new meaning for us this year.  As we close out 2013, we simply can't believe how blessed we are to share our lives with this sweet little guy!

Wishing you all a very happy holiday.  We are still pinching ourselves each day that we get to finally spend our holidays with the magic of a child.  Our hearts are so very full this Christmas!

So thankful

We have so much to be thankful for this year, but this sweet face tops our list. 

We're also so incredibly thankful to his birthmother who chose to entrust this sweet soul to us. 

Nine month update coming soon.  Happy Thanksgiving... may you all be surrounded by those you love.

8 months...

I know I say this each and every month, but I have no idea how it is possible that our little man is already 8 months old. This sweet face has stolen our hearts.

Quinn continues to be a rock star.  He's over 23 lbs and 28 inches.  He's got 8 teeth and is so close to crawling.  He enjoys cereal, sweet potatoes, apples, and pears.  He'll tolerate squash, but won't even consider anything green.  I keep trying avocado, since it's one of my favorite things right now and he won't have any part of it. 

He sits on his own, and is in constant motion.  He spins in circles anytime he's sitting.  He rolls to get what he wants and we're sure he's so close to crawling.  He loves to stand and will bounce in the arms or lap of anyone who holds him.  He's in love with Romeo, and thinks he is the funniest thing in the world.  (Romeo tolerates him, and will let him pet him but is still a little unsure of this tiny human.)

Life is crazy, but we're trying to embrace every moment of fall.  We've been to the apple orchard and the pumpkin patch.  We've enjoyed time with friends and enjoyed the summer like weather.  We can't wait for Halloween.  Here are some of our favorite moments of the past month.

Stealing a few moments of summer like weather in September.

Hanging out with friends at a Football game... Abbie wanted to hold Quinn, but I am not sure who is holding who!

Maddie poses for a photo with Quinn before Homecoming

Picking our perfect pumpkin!

My heart melts a little more each day! 

Finally FINAL

We're excited to announce that Quinn's adoption was finalized today.  After some extra hurdles with our agency, the paperwork was finally submitted and we can officially say that we are a forever family of three. 

In Illinois, families attend an initial court date close to birth, but do not attend the final court date which is more of a formality.  We got word from our attorney via email that she had the final decree in hand this afternoon.  It's official... we are parents!

While this was really just the formality at this point, as we've been his parents since the day he was placed in our arms.  But I do think I was holding my breath until everything was final.  We're breathing just a little easier tonight.

As I drove home tonight with this news fresh in my heart, the song Home by Phillip Phillips came on.  We used the song in our adoption profile video, and hearing it made me tear up.  We finally made it.  We finally have our family that we fought so hard and so long for.  I think it is going to take some time for it all to sink in. 

Thirteen years, IVF failures, miscarriages, failed adoptions, heartache and grief....

all worth it.

For those of you still fighting... I always wanted some assurance in the darkest hours that it was all going to be worth it in the end.  And while I wouldn't wish our journey on anyone, I can look back and say that I would do it all over again if it meant I would be able to hold my son today.

And that sweet boy knew his momma needed just a little more snuggles tonight.  Lately he has wanted to go to sleep on his own in his crib.  Tonight he fell asleep in my arms and snuggled into my arms.  And the tears fell as I sat there rocking him.

We made it.

Thank you from the bottom of my heart to each and every one of you who has supported us on this long path.  My heart swells with gratitude for each and every person who helped our dreams of parenthood become a reality.

Seven Months....

I've been trying to make this post for ten days, and life just gets in the way.  Honestly, life is great and I am trying to soak up every moment I can with my little man.  Often by the time Quinn goes to bed, I am exhausted and writing a post is beyond my mental capabilities.  But I want to make sure that I document Quinn's milestones, and share those with those of you who still follow our story.

 

Quinn is our miracle, and continues to be a dream baby.  His personality continues to blossom and he's more fun to be around each and every day.  He's well over 23lbs now and is moving into 12 month clothing.  Yikes!  He still prefers a bottle over food, but likes cereal, sweet potatoes, pears, and apples.  We're going to give green veggies another try, and I made some butternut squash that I am excited to try with him.  He sleeps through the night- just about every night.  He goes to bed between 7 and 8, and wakes up between 4 and 6.  We know we're pretty lucky!

He sits up independently, and loves to spin in circles.  He doesn't have much interest in crawling, but we're working on it.  He loves to be standing up and continues to be a jumper any chance he gets.  He's starting to play with toys on his own and likes to spend time on his play mat.  

He finally has teeth on the top- in fact, there are four teeth up there!  Teeth #7 & #8 have almost broken through.  I am hoping we have a break from teething once he has all 8 fully in.  He's been fussy the last few days, but we know it's nothing compared to what many babies experience.  

Even seven months in, I still have moments that I really can't believe we're really his parents. Our wait was so long and painful at times, that I simply look at him and tears well up in my eyes.  It's the simply moments like a lazy Sunday morning with us all snuggling in bed that take my breath away.  For all those days that I just wanted the assurance that it was all going to be worth it- I can finally say it was.  Every painful day brought us closer to this sweet face... and for that I am eternally grateful.