I have been pretty lazy most of the summer. But considering the school year I had, I think I deserve it! :-) I am finally getting some things done. School will be here before I know it!
I think I have decided on a grad school program. Hopefully everything will fall into place. It starts right when school does, so I will be hitting the ground running for sure. I know that I am much better when I am busy anyway. My best year in college I had an overload of classes and worked 30 hours a week off campus. I am excited to be starting a grad program... something I should have done years ago.
I haven't been running at all, but I have been riding my bike. Chris is training for the marathon so I ride my bike as he runs. Last week we went 4 miles one day and yesterday we did 6 miles. We had planned to run/ride today but Chris ended up getting his eyes dialated at the eye doctor and couldn't see very well. He was wearing his sun glasses... I told him he was my own personal Stevie Wonder! He didn't think that was too funny.
I am making progress on getting all of my photos organized. I'd like to get my studio cleaned up so that we can have a girl's "playdate" here before school starts. We'll see how that goes. I know that if I just schedule something I am more likely to get things cleaned and ready to go. We'll see. One hurdle at a time.
I still haven't made any progress on making a Dr appt. I think once I get the grad school stuff taken care of, I will work on that. At least I am moving forward with my life somewhat. Time will tell. I need to make an appt with the counselor I have been talking about. I am hoping she will help me work through whatever is keeping me from moving forward with treatment.
Back to being productive!
Wednesday, July 23, 2008
Monday, July 21, 2008
Monday Update
Just thought I would post a little update as to what I have been up to. I haven't scrapped in a few days, but have spent most of the past two days here in my scraproom. I found two rubbermaid totes FULL of photos that I didn't realize I had. I have been getting them all organized into my LOM system. I am so excited to see that it really works for me! I still have a LONG way to go, but at least I had a starting point for all of these photos and such. Most of the photos are from at least 10 years ago, so it was fun looking at all of them. Big hair and all... LOL.
It all started because I have finally decided to start a master's program this fall. It is something I should have done a LONG time ago, but life just wasn't right at the time. I could have done a cohort group right in my building years ago, but I was sure I was going to get pregnant and would have to leave the program. Funny how life works out, huh? So now I am just going for it. I should have started the process back in June, but I wasn't ready I guess. Now I am trying to make a decision about which program to go with and then I have to get all of my paperwork together. All of the applications need to know your undergrad GPA. I know the ballpark, but I don't remember the exact number. I know that I have a copy of my final transcript around here somewhere, but I have not been able to find it. :-( What I did find was the boxes listed above! LOL. I think I may call my district office because I know they have one on file so I can go get a copy of it. Most of the programs also need a copy of my current teaching certificate which is also kept at the district office. So looks like I will be heading into school sometime this week!
We've been busy with friends and the swim team. We went to the water part at Six Flags on Tuesday... that was fun, but our day was short since Chris had to get to practice. We had a double graduation party on Saturday for siblings on our swim team. The daughter is off to North Carolina in the fall. We've known her since she was 8, so we felt really OLD at her graduation party! LOL. The conference swim meet was also this weekend for the summer season, and Chris' team won. He was really excited about that since they lost the winter one by just a few points. We went out and celebrated last night at a local pizza place. We stayed until the mosquitos got so bad on the deck that they were carrying the small children away!
We took Dad's convertible out to lunch and we went to a place about an hour from here. I didn't even think about putting on sunscreen... and I ended up with a nice burn that includes a tan line... where the seat belt was! It is rather funny to see! My dad has this great dark skin, so he didn't even think about getting burned. LOL. Live and learn. Now I just need to put on sunblock everywhere BUT where the seat belt was next time we are out.
It's rainy and gloomy here today. Chris did not have morning practice this morning thankfully. He has been getting up at 4:30 every day this summer. He is just so tired! He is home by 8:30 am but then has office work to do. He is back at the pool by 3:45 and then gets home around 10. He is just plain tired! He has a few weeks off in August, so that will be good for him. I am not used to sharing the house during the summer, though! I am used to having my own space and my own schedule. I am sure we will survive!
It all started because I have finally decided to start a master's program this fall. It is something I should have done a LONG time ago, but life just wasn't right at the time. I could have done a cohort group right in my building years ago, but I was sure I was going to get pregnant and would have to leave the program. Funny how life works out, huh? So now I am just going for it. I should have started the process back in June, but I wasn't ready I guess. Now I am trying to make a decision about which program to go with and then I have to get all of my paperwork together. All of the applications need to know your undergrad GPA. I know the ballpark, but I don't remember the exact number. I know that I have a copy of my final transcript around here somewhere, but I have not been able to find it. :-( What I did find was the boxes listed above! LOL. I think I may call my district office because I know they have one on file so I can go get a copy of it. Most of the programs also need a copy of my current teaching certificate which is also kept at the district office. So looks like I will be heading into school sometime this week!
We've been busy with friends and the swim team. We went to the water part at Six Flags on Tuesday... that was fun, but our day was short since Chris had to get to practice. We had a double graduation party on Saturday for siblings on our swim team. The daughter is off to North Carolina in the fall. We've known her since she was 8, so we felt really OLD at her graduation party! LOL. The conference swim meet was also this weekend for the summer season, and Chris' team won. He was really excited about that since they lost the winter one by just a few points. We went out and celebrated last night at a local pizza place. We stayed until the mosquitos got so bad on the deck that they were carrying the small children away!
We took Dad's convertible out to lunch and we went to a place about an hour from here. I didn't even think about putting on sunscreen... and I ended up with a nice burn that includes a tan line... where the seat belt was! It is rather funny to see! My dad has this great dark skin, so he didn't even think about getting burned. LOL. Live and learn. Now I just need to put on sunblock everywhere BUT where the seat belt was next time we are out.
It's rainy and gloomy here today. Chris did not have morning practice this morning thankfully. He has been getting up at 4:30 every day this summer. He is just so tired! He is home by 8:30 am but then has office work to do. He is back at the pool by 3:45 and then gets home around 10. He is just plain tired! He has a few weeks off in August, so that will be good for him. I am not used to sharing the house during the summer, though! I am used to having my own space and my own schedule. I am sure we will survive!
Sunday, July 20, 2008
Happy Birthday Dad!
Today is my dad's birthday. We've always had a pretty good relationship, but we've had our moments as I am sure every dad and daughter does. I am proud to say he's my dad... even if he does make me crazy every once in a while!Chris is at a meet and my mom is out of town so the two of us went out to lunch. We decided to drive out to Wheeling so we had lots of time to talk in the car. It was nice to hear about his life and all of the jobs he has held. He has done so much in his life. I am hoping I will remember enough of what we talked about to write it all down later. I was able to even ask some questions and gain some insight into his life and my own childhood. It was a really nice day!
Wednesday, July 9, 2008
Lazy Summer Days
Well I am finally on full summer break! Summer school is over and I don't really have any plans for the rest of the summer. I am LOVING it! :-) I get to see lots of Chris since he is home during the afternoons for his "office hours" for the swim team. I do feel like I am doing a great deal of cooking and cleaning, but I guess that is what happens when you are home for three meals a day!
I have enjoyed lots of time to read... something I love but rarely have time to do in the school year. I am a big fan of chick-lit books and have had several of them on my bookshelf for months just begging to read them. I belong to a great site called paperbackswap that allows you to swap paperback books free of charge. You simply list all of the books you have that you are willing to send out and others do the same. When something catches your eye or is on your wishlist, the other member is contacted and then they agree to send it to you. The only cost is the media mail rate for postage. So, I have had all of these books sitting on my shelf just calling to me.
The most recent one I read to two days from cover to cover: Annie Freeman's Fabulous Traveling Funeral by Kris Radish. It is the story of women who are charged with the task of disseminating a beloved friend's ashes across the United States at places that were important to her. Along the way these five strangers become close friends and learn more about themselves and their own lives. It made me want to gather up all of my girlfriends and have a roadtrip for sure! The book also highlights the strength and quirkiness of women today. I am looking forward to reading other books by this author.
~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~
We had a great 4th of July. I walked the 5k much to Chris' dismay, but my knee is still not 100% and I had not been training for it at all. I need to get back into a routine for sure. Here is the "before" picture of Chris and I:
Chris finished just over 22 minutes. He wanted to be closer to 20, but is happy with this time. He is training for the Chicago Marathon again, so he is not really training for this distance right now.
We all stayed and watched the parade as well. Antioch has one of the LONGEST 4th of July Parades ever. This year my mom and aunt were part of the parade as part of the Lakes Region Historical Society. This organization was really important to my grandfather so my mom and aunt have kept a strong involvement since he passed away. Here they are in the parade:
After the parade we went over to our friends' house for a barbeque. The kids were waiting for Coach Chris to get there for a water fight. He did not disappoint:
We later played washers and had lots of great food and fun! We ended the night with a last minute mad dash to the fireworks in Antioch. It is set to music so it is nice to be at the park. We literally set up our chairs just as the first fireworks were going off! Here is a photo of the finale:
All in all it was great day. We are blessed to have some wonderful friends in our life!
I have enjoyed lots of time to read... something I love but rarely have time to do in the school year. I am a big fan of chick-lit books and have had several of them on my bookshelf for months just begging to read them. I belong to a great site called paperbackswap that allows you to swap paperback books free of charge. You simply list all of the books you have that you are willing to send out and others do the same. When something catches your eye or is on your wishlist, the other member is contacted and then they agree to send it to you. The only cost is the media mail rate for postage. So, I have had all of these books sitting on my shelf just calling to me.
The most recent one I read to two days from cover to cover: Annie Freeman's Fabulous Traveling Funeral by Kris Radish. It is the story of women who are charged with the task of disseminating a beloved friend's ashes across the United States at places that were important to her. Along the way these five strangers become close friends and learn more about themselves and their own lives. It made me want to gather up all of my girlfriends and have a roadtrip for sure! The book also highlights the strength and quirkiness of women today. I am looking forward to reading other books by this author.
~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~
We had a great 4th of July. I walked the 5k much to Chris' dismay, but my knee is still not 100% and I had not been training for it at all. I need to get back into a routine for sure. Here is the "before" picture of Chris and I:
Chris finished just over 22 minutes. He wanted to be closer to 20, but is happy with this time. He is training for the Chicago Marathon again, so he is not really training for this distance right now.We all stayed and watched the parade as well. Antioch has one of the LONGEST 4th of July Parades ever. This year my mom and aunt were part of the parade as part of the Lakes Region Historical Society. This organization was really important to my grandfather so my mom and aunt have kept a strong involvement since he passed away. Here they are in the parade:
After the parade we went over to our friends' house for a barbeque. The kids were waiting for Coach Chris to get there for a water fight. He did not disappoint:
We later played washers and had lots of great food and fun! We ended the night with a last minute mad dash to the fireworks in Antioch. It is set to music so it is nice to be at the park. We literally set up our chairs just as the first fireworks were going off! Here is a photo of the finale:
All in all it was great day. We are blessed to have some wonderful friends in our life!
Monday, June 30, 2008
Monday Perspective
Chris is home after his travel trip. He is a brave man! He took 28 teenagers to Minneapolis for a swim meet and the Mall of America. I was mad that he had scheduled the meet this weekend... one of my good friends from work had her wedding this weekend as well. I hated going to the wedding by myself, but it kept me from having to chaperone the trip! I don't like when he is gone, so I am always in a better mood once he gets home!
I didn't make any calls today. I did have lunch with friends and then had to "catch up" with Chris. There is always tomorrow, right?
I am planning to run... okay WALK another 5k on the 4th. Ever since Romeo decided to pull me down our front stairs, my knee has been bothering me. I tried to run on Saturday morning, but had sharp pains in my knee. Probably not a good sign. I have been walking, though. So at least I will walk the 5k. Chris has run this race every year so it will be nice to be taking part in it this year. Of course I won't be able to get the pictures I usually get though! I have years worth of photos. I may just have to talk someone into getting up early with us and taking photos. I am hoping that once I am done with summer school I can get into a routine of running/walking in the mornings before it gets too hot. By the time I get home from summer school I am just too tired... LOL. Only two more days of summer school, though! YAY!
Ok... off to watch the Bachelorette...
I didn't make any calls today. I did have lunch with friends and then had to "catch up" with Chris. There is always tomorrow, right?
I am planning to run... okay WALK another 5k on the 4th. Ever since Romeo decided to pull me down our front stairs, my knee has been bothering me. I tried to run on Saturday morning, but had sharp pains in my knee. Probably not a good sign. I have been walking, though. So at least I will walk the 5k. Chris has run this race every year so it will be nice to be taking part in it this year. Of course I won't be able to get the pictures I usually get though! I have years worth of photos. I may just have to talk someone into getting up early with us and taking photos. I am hoping that once I am done with summer school I can get into a routine of running/walking in the mornings before it gets too hot. By the time I get home from summer school I am just too tired... LOL. Only two more days of summer school, though! YAY!
Ok... off to watch the Bachelorette...
Saturday, June 28, 2008
One of THOSE posts...
You've been warned. All three of you that read this. :-) This is going to be one of THOSE posts. One of those posts where I vent about infertility and our failed adoption. You knew one was coming soon...
We've been doing NOTHING in the infertility/becoming parents department for close to a year now. It's been more than 2 years since we were in active treatment. The last "treatment" was exploratory surgery in November of 2005. Surgery that once again showed that everything was "fine" Last night I spent several hours reading over all of my entries since 2003. We started "trying" in 2000 and serious treatment in soo2. It breaks my heart to go back and read my words and hopes.... especially since I know how the story ends... at least how each and every cycle ends. I don't know that I will ever be over all of the pain we've endured on this path to parenthood. I hope and pray that someday when we have the child we dream of, that I will be able to look into that child's eyes and know that all of my pain was worth it. In my heart, I have to beleive that will happen.. otherwise I am not sure how I can go on.
I am TERRIFIED to go back into treatment. I was well versed in all of the most up to date research and treatment plans in 2004. Now I feel like we are starting over. I really don't even know where to start. Do we go back to our last RE and see what he would suggest? Of course, my last memories with them are not pleasant thus the reason we've been on this "break" Chris feels strongly that we should exhaust all of our options with treatment before moving on. In my heart, I know he is right. I need some closure and I need to close this door- either with a pregnancy or knowing that we tried and it just wasn't meant to be. What doctor do I choose to hold my "golden eggs" the last shot we have at an IVF? How do I know I am choosing the right one? Looking back, my track record isn't so great when it comes to choosing doctors.
When we were entrenched in treatment before, I had an amazing network of online friends going through the same thing. I don't have that anymore. Most of those girls did get pregnant and have moved on. While I am THRILLED for each and every one of them, it still breaks my heart that I am still "left behind" even with my infertile friends. I don't even know where to begin to look for a new support network. I am a little too jaded for women who are just starting IVF. Let's face it, nobody wants to hear about the girl who has had four failures and still doesn't have a diagnosis when you are SURE your first IVF is going to work. My real life friends are great and have supported me 110% BUT they haven't been in my shoes. Many of them have gone on to have children and several more are now talking about starting a family soon.
So where do I go from here? I know I need to be proactive. I need to make some phone calls and do some research. Here we go....
We've been doing NOTHING in the infertility/becoming parents department for close to a year now. It's been more than 2 years since we were in active treatment. The last "treatment" was exploratory surgery in November of 2005. Surgery that once again showed that everything was "fine" Last night I spent several hours reading over all of my entries since 2003. We started "trying" in 2000 and serious treatment in soo2. It breaks my heart to go back and read my words and hopes.... especially since I know how the story ends... at least how each and every cycle ends. I don't know that I will ever be over all of the pain we've endured on this path to parenthood. I hope and pray that someday when we have the child we dream of, that I will be able to look into that child's eyes and know that all of my pain was worth it. In my heart, I have to beleive that will happen.. otherwise I am not sure how I can go on.
I am TERRIFIED to go back into treatment. I was well versed in all of the most up to date research and treatment plans in 2004. Now I feel like we are starting over. I really don't even know where to start. Do we go back to our last RE and see what he would suggest? Of course, my last memories with them are not pleasant thus the reason we've been on this "break" Chris feels strongly that we should exhaust all of our options with treatment before moving on. In my heart, I know he is right. I need some closure and I need to close this door- either with a pregnancy or knowing that we tried and it just wasn't meant to be. What doctor do I choose to hold my "golden eggs" the last shot we have at an IVF? How do I know I am choosing the right one? Looking back, my track record isn't so great when it comes to choosing doctors.
When we were entrenched in treatment before, I had an amazing network of online friends going through the same thing. I don't have that anymore. Most of those girls did get pregnant and have moved on. While I am THRILLED for each and every one of them, it still breaks my heart that I am still "left behind" even with my infertile friends. I don't even know where to begin to look for a new support network. I am a little too jaded for women who are just starting IVF. Let's face it, nobody wants to hear about the girl who has had four failures and still doesn't have a diagnosis when you are SURE your first IVF is going to work. My real life friends are great and have supported me 110% BUT they haven't been in my shoes. Many of them have gone on to have children and several more are now talking about starting a family soon.
So where do I go from here? I know I need to be proactive. I need to make some phone calls and do some research. Here we go....
Monday, June 23, 2008
Long time coming...
It's been too long since I posted here on the blog. Had to deal with the end of the school year. I can't say that I have EVER been more happy to see a year end in all of my career! It was a TOUGH one, but I am a stronger person as a result. I hope that I have learned from the year and will be able to be an even better teacher and friend in the coming school year.
Chris and I celebrated our 12th wedding anniversary yesterday. Hard to imagine that we have been married that long! When I look back at our wedding photos, we look like kids... and we essentially were!
It has not been an easy 12 years, but I can honestly say that I love this man more today than I did that day. We have grown into the adults we are today as a result of the challenges we have faced. We have our moments, and I am still learning to love the life of a coach's wife. I am getting there. :-) We've been blessed with 12 years to focus on our marriage and just the two of us. I know that there are many marriages out there that are not able to do that. They are blessed with children early in marriage, and the entire marriage is based on raising kids. We have built a very strong marriage that I pray will be a foundation for our family. My heart still breaks when I look into Chris' eyes and imagine what our child would look like.
We returned to one of our favorite places... the Lazy Cloud Inn. We LOVE this place. The owners have thought of everything and truly have created a romantic retreat for couples to reconnect. The best part of the weekend was having Chris all to myself for three whole days... that is a RARE thing due to his job. We relaxed and spent lots of time talking and laughing. Chris surprised me with beautiful roses, chocolates and a teddy bear. We also had in-room massages and a picnic basket dinner. It was all VERY romantic.
We were also entertained by the wonderful wildlife outside the suite. There was an amazing private deck where we sat and enjoyed the show. We saw many birds including a cardinal and blue jay and a few woodpeckers. In the morning we had these little guys to entertain us:
But then in the evenings, there were two of these masked bandits that emptied the bird feeder. They also got a little too close to the deck for my liking. We started having dinner out on the deck, but then moved inside because I was a little afraid of these guys. Silly for a country girl, but they just made me nervous!
All in all, it was an amazing weekend with the man I love. It was just the time we needed. We talked a little about where we are going with our infertility. We didn't make any solid decisions as it is still such a tender subject. But I feel that am ready to start moving forward. We just need to decide what direction.
I need to get into a summer routine and start to get some things done around here! I am hoping to get a plan into place soon. I am planning to run/WALK a 5k on the 4th of July. It will be mostly WALKING for sure as I have not been on a routine at all! That will start tomorrow....
Chris and I celebrated our 12th wedding anniversary yesterday. Hard to imagine that we have been married that long! When I look back at our wedding photos, we look like kids... and we essentially were!
It has not been an easy 12 years, but I can honestly say that I love this man more today than I did that day. We have grown into the adults we are today as a result of the challenges we have faced. We have our moments, and I am still learning to love the life of a coach's wife. I am getting there. :-) We've been blessed with 12 years to focus on our marriage and just the two of us. I know that there are many marriages out there that are not able to do that. They are blessed with children early in marriage, and the entire marriage is based on raising kids. We have built a very strong marriage that I pray will be a foundation for our family. My heart still breaks when I look into Chris' eyes and imagine what our child would look like.
We returned to one of our favorite places... the Lazy Cloud Inn. We LOVE this place. The owners have thought of everything and truly have created a romantic retreat for couples to reconnect. The best part of the weekend was having Chris all to myself for three whole days... that is a RARE thing due to his job. We relaxed and spent lots of time talking and laughing. Chris surprised me with beautiful roses, chocolates and a teddy bear. We also had in-room massages and a picnic basket dinner. It was all VERY romantic.
We were also entertained by the wonderful wildlife outside the suite. There was an amazing private deck where we sat and enjoyed the show. We saw many birds including a cardinal and blue jay and a few woodpeckers. In the morning we had these little guys to entertain us:
But then in the evenings, there were two of these masked bandits that emptied the bird feeder. They also got a little too close to the deck for my liking. We started having dinner out on the deck, but then moved inside because I was a little afraid of these guys. Silly for a country girl, but they just made me nervous!
All in all, it was an amazing weekend with the man I love. It was just the time we needed. We talked a little about where we are going with our infertility. We didn't make any solid decisions as it is still such a tender subject. But I feel that am ready to start moving forward. We just need to decide what direction.
I need to get into a summer routine and start to get some things done around here! I am hoping to get a plan into place soon. I am planning to run/WALK a 5k on the 4th of July. It will be mostly WALKING for sure as I have not been on a routine at all! That will start tomorrow....
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